Messy Life

It’s been a rough few days for me and I won’t go into detail, but a lot of things shifted in a short period of time and life just got a lot harder for the foreseeable future. I have no more tears to cry and I have no more strength to give, but I’m trying. BUT, also, the past few days have made me think about life and the way I’ve always wanted it to be, and the way it really is.

I really didn’t realize that I did this till yesterday, but I put things into boxes. I have a box for how life should be. I have a box for how relationships should be. I have a box for how friends should be. You get the idea. I had this image of how everything should be and turn out in my life. There were neat little boxes that continued through my life: my own little plan. And then things changed. Every single one of those boxes were crushed. 

And then I realized this: life doesn’t fit into those boxes. Life isn’t perfect and easy and happy all the time. Life is messy, it’s real, it’s raw. Life is full of ups and downs, trials, sadness, honesty, love, laughter, anger, tears, surprises, and so much more. It’s a mix of the good and the bad, coming together to create something wonderful.

You can’t put life into little boxes. You can’t put people into them either. Not one person fits perfectly into your box of what they should be. I know I don’t. I’m a little over here, a little over there, and  little all over the place. I don’t want to be put into a box, I want to be me. Crazy, funny, passionate, goofy, weird, unapologetically me. 

So that brings me to my final thought… Even though life is messy and hard, it’s so much more rewarding when you fight for it, than letting everything come easy and be predictable. Because no one wants to be put into a box.

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